10 Things I've Realized After Living in Barcelona for 2 Years
Two years of adventures and journeys condensed down
Last week was the two year anniversary of moving to Barcelona. If there’s one thing I’ve definitely learned is that a lot of the things I personally value are not as important or necessary to others. The thoughts below are really a reflection of my perspective and experiences, though I’m hoping there’s something here you can glean for your own life and situation.
Barcelona ended up being a great choice. I call it a “small big city” (to the ire of locals) as it feels, in many ways, like a miniature Los Angeles. I can walk across the city in 30-40 minutes, or take Bicing, the local bike share program, which cuts the trip in half. Add in the Metro system, which has some very new, clean, and contemporary trains, as well as the larger train system that takes you across Spain and beyond into France… and I basically have easy access to go wherever I want. Very different from LA in this way, I absolutely do not miss owning a car, and hopefully, I never will have to own one again.
I’m grateful that Barcelona has a (somewhat) diverse food scene. There’s lots of good Indian, a few good Mexican places, many great Middle Eastern spots, solid sushi, etc. Barcelona is also home to the best restaurant in the world, Disfrutar, (which is four blocks from my apartment) as well as the best bar in the world, Sips (also, literally two blocks away from me). Where things get challenging is beyond those few good places, it’s Catalan food everywhere, all the time. I can’t tell you how tired I am of pan con tomate or croquettes or patas bravas or Russian salad. I crave diversity in my food offerings while the Catalans are quite content with the same thing, every day. I really should do a list of the best places to eat and drink in Barcelona, I have some great recs!
From the perspective of the arts, Barcelona is both hit and miss. Obviously, there are iconic works such as all of Gaudi’s buildings, but then it’s contrasted with places like the Moco Museum which is cheesy, like the collection of a no-taste tech bro. Don’t even get me started on the Banksy Museum that has low quality printouts of his art put up on the walls. I really appreciate the Alzueta Gallery, The Museu Nacional d’Art de Catalunya as well as the KBr Photography Center, there are some places to see art. Where it’s challenging is there isn’t a lot of interesting, contemporary art. Coming from Los Angeles I was spoiled! There was constantly interesting art and design events and openings and parties going on. It was amazing and I miss it a lot.
Meeting people is hard. Tying into the last point, a lack of a creative scene means less opportunities to meet likeminded people. Kyle and I have been to many meet-ups or dinner parties and we end up meeting other immigrants and we end up talking about how our Spanish is going or other inane things (which is part of being a new immigrant!) but I’m over it. I want to talk about art and new records and that great new wine bar you need to try or this secret spot in the Pyrenees I need to visit. A lot of the time the only thing we have in common is that we speak English.
I’m not made for humid weather. I lived in California for 40 years, half in northern California and half in Los Angeles, and my body is regulated and capable for handling dry heats. I don’t think I knew humid weather existed until I was in my 30s, no joke. How do people do it? I have to change my clothes three times a day. When I walk to get groceries I come back soaked. I’m learning to deal with it but it’s a lot.
One of my favorite places to go with Kyle and the boys is Sitges. We call it our “Palm Springs by the Mediterranean” as it’s a short journey from Barcelona and it’s full of gays and great food. It’s a small beach town where the water is super clean, the chiringuitos are great for grabbing an Aperol Spritz, and overall, it’s a perfect place to get away for a weekend vacation. We have brought many friends and family to visit Sitges and it’s been a hit with all of them.
Barcelona is a fashion desert. Again, with Los Angeles as my point of reference, Barcelona is a town full of old Catalans in Massimo Dutti or British tourists in white tees and beach shorts. Every now and then you’ll see a striking abuelita in bright colors and flowing garments with amazing jewelry, like a Spanish Iris Apfel, or even the Japanese girls visiting, though both are rare. Kyle is constantly getting stares, nothing mean, but more dumbfounded, as most people here have never seen a fit gay man with chartreuse hair and short shorts in their life. There are great places to shop here, which is the irony, spots like Bassal Store or The Outpost, but Catalans are quite comfortable folks.
Live music events are beyond compare. Barcelona hosts Primavera Sound, our version of Coachella, along with Sónar, an incredible electronic music festival. In the spring and fall there is SOUNDIT which Kyle and I go to almost every other weekend. It’s great because it’s during the evening and things usually end by midnight. We have tickets for the upcoming MIRA Festival where we’ll get to see A.G. Cook and Oneohtrix Point Never, and getting to see Jessica Pratt later in the year. I feel like I’ve been to more concerts in Barcelona in two years than I did in all my 17 in Los Angeles (this is not true).
Working and living are different things. I’ve now been freelancing for the last 8 months and making things work thanks to the great connections I’ve made over the last couple decades. I feel lucky to be able to focus on simply living and existing. I love how much time I have for cooking and making meals, on going for walks with the dogs, or being able to venture off to a small seaside town for a week. I’m grateful to have some distance between “work” and who I am as a person. It definitely feels like I’m relearning who I am, a healthy, self-reflective mid-life crisis lol
Barcelona may not be forever. Overall, it’s a wonderful city and a great place to live. There is really nothing bad about it. I think what’s lacking, and what Kyle and I talk about a lot, is the lack of friction. The lack of energy, of excitement (except when Spain wins the Euro Cup, then they honk and yell all night long). There is creativity here though it may not be enough, or the right kinds, to really feed our desires. Paris still feels like a very real itch we need to scratch, and we will absolutely be visiting in the fall again once the Olympic mess is over. I never imagined leaving LA, still the best place in the world IMO, until one day, I did. Time will tell!
So many thoughts...we're six years into Berlin and I grok a lot of what you're getting at.
Berlin is also a "small big city", which no native German I've ever met would agree with, except our one friend who did a year of university at UCLA. Coming from LA really sets you up with an expectation of how hard/easy it is to get around. And selling our car when we moved...oh the joy!
Berlin food is outstanding, and being vegan here beyond easy. On the other hand, I was in a small town near Dresden a few weeks ago and the answer to my question, "do you have oat milk (for the coffee)?" was, "natürlich nicht!", or, "of course not!" It was a very friendly "natürlich nicht", in a "oh aren't you sweet, what a silly question" vibe.
Art scene = strong, but I don't go to enough galleries. That's on me. A ton of museums, and I've had a yearly membership pretty much the whole time we've lived here. As such, I feel very surrounded by art, but not as clued into the contemporary scene as I'd like to be.
Meeting people when you're over 40, don't have kids, and work largely alone/home office is tough, language and cultural challenges aside. I'm also pretty much done building an "expat" friend group. I didn't move to Germany to socialise with Americans (and talk about how weird Germany is and how broken the US is). After six years we do have a solid group of German friends, who also socialise with our American & English friends.
The weather this summer has been bizarre. Full stop.
Berlin fashion exists, but you have to be on the lookout. Most of the city dresses like it's 19 years old. Whenever I'm in London I have to hold myself back from buying every outfit I see.
Work vs life, yeah, that's not a small part of why we left. The pace and balance here are 100x better, even when it's actually been a shitty year for me work-wise. Still, the LA feeling of working my ass off to simply tread water is gone.
There's enough friction here for us, and if I had to guess, we're here to stay. Granted, I have no clue what's going to happen next week, let alone in five years - but if I were a betting man, I'd bet on Berlin for many years to come.
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Coupla cuties! It's comforting to read this, even though I haven't lived in Europe, when I moved from NYC to SF I mourned the loss of that excitement and friction you mentioned. I supposed I eventually got used to it and traveled a lot more to find it. Also, had some fun times at Razzmatazz in the early 2000s, maybe it's still fun??